Your Mother is a Whore
|Image= |Band= Gareth Madalena Bar Patrons |Genre= |Album= |Length= |Writer= |Last song= |Next song= }} Your Mother is a Whore is a song written by Alan Menken and Glenn SlaterAfterBuzz TV: Galavant Season 2 Episodes 5 & 6 Review w/ Karen DavidExaminer:‘Galavant’ preview: A crazy battle, a brutish birthday and Gal's daddy issuesTV Line: Galavant Rides Again With Awkward Bromance, a Han Solo Moment and a Bawdy Tune You May Never Hear which was intended to used during the bar scene in the episode About Last Knight. The song was so wildly risqué that it would have included a whopping 57 bleeps (the record for ABC is 22 bleeps in an hour),Stay 2uned: Even United Airlines Couldn’t Kill The ‘Galavant’ Panel’s Spirits at SFSketchFest so the network put the kibosh on the tune before the cast could make a proper recording. Menken's demo was played for those who attended the Galavant panel at SF Sketchfest 2016, along with the similarly shocking original demo for Build a New Tomorrow. The demo is included in The Unreleased Collection and The Complete Collection, both'' released in 2017. The central gag is that Gareth and Madalena are trying to pick a fight with the bar patrons, but they're so terrified of the king and queen that they just one-up the insults to their own mothers (and other relatives) in increasingly absurd and disgusting ways. Though we can only guess how... There was never an uncensored version of the lyric -- the bleeps are written into the song from the beginning. Lyrics 'Gareth: Oi— you got a problem? '''Peasant 1: Nonono, your highness! Madalena: Well, you should! Gareth here just called your mother a whore! Gareth: No, I... I did! She's a whore Peasant 1: Yup! Gareth: A whore Peasant 1: Sure! Gareth: Your mother is a whore! Peasant 1: She's the biggest freaking whore you've ever seen, before! Peasant 1's Mother: Yes it's so! Gareth: What? Peasant 1's Mother: Hello! I'm his mother! Peasant 1: And a ho! Peasant 1's Mother: If your grace would have a go, just say the word! Gareth: God! No! Peasant 2: Mine's a tramp and a harlot to the nth degree! Peasant 3: God forgive me my son but she'll put out for free! Peasant 1: Mine's a slag! Peasant 2: Mine's a wench! Peasant 3: Mine is both, and also French! Peasants: She's a whore, God save the king! Gareth: There's got to be someone here who I can insult! Someone? Anyone? Madalena: Oooh, him! Peasant 4: She's a *bleep*! Gareth: What? Peasant 4: A *bleep*! Madalena: Eww! Peasant 4: My mother is a *bleep* you! Your highness might have *bleep* like the *bleep* in! Peasant 4: Mine will *bleep*! I don't kid! Loves to *bleep* and always did! Madalena: Gross! Gareth: You kiss her with that mouth? Peasant 4: No, that's an extra quid! Gareth: Well your grandma— Peasant 4: A *bleep**bleep* from way back when! Gareth: And your aunt? Peasant 4: She's a nun before she *bleep*s amen! Peasants: And our wives? Total skanks of the very lowest ranks Peasant 1: Plus my dad is a whore! Peasants: God save the king! Madalena: I don't believe this! Gareth: Quick! The door! Fresh meat! Gareth: Your mother is a *bleep*-ful and a *bleep* and *bleep* Peasant 5: Yes, I think she goes *bleep* until she *bleep* and *bleep*! Madalena: Ecch! Gareth: Your mother goes *bleep* a *bleep*-ing all over the place! Peasant 5: Yes, she *bleep* *bleep* and *bleep* *bleep*, your grace! Gareth: She's your mother *bleep**bleep*! Peasant 5: Sure, she loves to *bleep* *bleep* *bleep*! Wait, and then she *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* Up until she *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* Gareth: Nooooo! Peasant 5: Yes, and then she *bleeeeeeeeeep* *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* *bleeeeeeeep* Gareth: So-- Peasant 5: Wait, she also *bleeeeeeeeeep* Gareth: Just... wow! Peasant 5: So they're whores! Filthy whores! All our mothers dirty whores! No one's sluttier or smuttier! Peasant 1: Well, maybe yours! Peasants: Utter tarts! Off the charts! Peasant 5: I left out the sickest parts! Peasants: And we mean it from the bottom of our loyal hearts! Though I love my dear mama more than anything! Lord above, we can't disagree with you, our king! Though they're bores, she's a whore! Peasant 1's Mother: Wait, I'm actually a whore! Peasants: What's more You terrify us to the core! So one more drink and out the door! God save the king! Madalena: This is a disaster! References Category:Songs Category:Songs sung by Gareth Category:Songs sung by Madalena Category:Unused songs